A Star Pilot's Heart Read online

  A Star Pilot's Heart

  All The Stars In The Sky, Book #1

  Eva Delaney

  Vivi Clarke

  Eva Delaney

  Vivi Clarke

  Copyright 2019

  One

  I liked to practice staring down death.

  The final approach to Star Keeper Base, the heart of The Uprising, was as treacherous as my ex. The ring system of battle debris, asteroids, and mines made reaching the base impossible if you didn’t have the coordinates of the safe path.

  But I did the impossible on a routine basis.

  “Welcome back,” Polaris said from Mission Control. His voice wafted through my cockpit speakers, low and gentle. It was almost a relief to hear him after weeks alone on my ship.

  “Do you have the access codes?” he said.

  I reached under my ship’s control panel for the hidden transmitter that would send the encrypted codes. They proved that I was supposed to be here.

  “Thank you, Captain Cal.”

  I snorted. He used my official title, but my unofficial nickname.

  “Sending safe path coordinates now,” Polaris said.

  He was sweet, but I was still going to piss him off. “Save the electricity,” I said, my voice gruff from lack of use. “We’ll need it for a steamy, hot shower.”

  I didn’t mean it. Polaris was never more than the friendly guy in Mission Control. I just liked to make him stammer because he was the only guy who did when I teased him.

  Plus, it bought me time to switch off comms before he transmitted the coordinates. I didn’t need them.

  I needed to practice being terrified instead.

  Polaris once said I could fly the rings because I was reckless. I let him think that, but in truth, I could do it because I was anxious. I saw every possible danger before it reached my ship. That ability kept me alive all these years. Having the sense to be scared was a valuable skill that needed honing.

  My old self, back when I was a fighter pilot, wouldn’t believe that.

  I pushed the controls forward and nosedived my ship into the rings. The Firebrand’s red warning signals flashed and beeped. I bobbed my head and hummed, pretending that they were the strobe lights at a party and the alarms were the beat of a techno song. It helped keep me focused.

  One wrong flick of the controls and I’d be pancaked between two space rocks. That was what made it good practice. I spun the Firebrand between asteroids, skimmed the edges of mines as big as meteors. My stomach lurched as the gravity generators struggled to keep up. The safety webbing on my chair pulled tight over my shoulders to hold me in place.

  A piece of a capital ship from a long-ago battle changed direction. I moved with it, gliding over its surface, swerving to dodge decommissioned guns and bulkheads.

  “That’s my girl,” I muttered at the Firebrand and took one hand off the controls to pat the dashboard. My ship was the only thing in the galaxy I could rely on. The one thing that always looked after me, never let me down, and never left me.

  “Ah…sorry. They told me to cut in,” Polaris said. I stared wide-eyed at the comms speaker that I had definitely turned off. “And they said to say…ah…that we need that shipment of weapons more than we need your showing off. Sorry!”

  I could almost see him flinching. “How the hell did you get on my comms?”

  “New hacking trick?”

  “Keep your grubby hands out of my ship.” She was mine and mine alone. “Is the general there?”

  “Ah…yes.”

  “Tell her to fire you.”

  He went quiet for a moment. I chuckled.

  “An entrance to the safe path is coming up. I’m transmitting coordinates now. Lock into autopilot, Captain Cal…before your ship is crushed.”

  “If you’re concerned about my bodily integrity…” There were so many fun ways to end that sentence. I went with the practical one. “Quit distracting me.” My hands tightened on the controls and I dashed back into the tangled crush of space rocks.

  “It’s an order. You’ll be in trouble—”

  “Well, you know, I have a hard time with authority.” I tipped the Firebrand into a nosedive to avoid a chunk of spinning debris. My stomach tried to claw its way up my throat, but I loved the feeling. It nearly drowned out the anxiety that squirmed through my chest. You didn’t always get that weightless feeling, that rush of adrenaline, while flying cargo.

  “You didn’t have problems with authority before,” Polaris dropped his voice as though telling me a secret. It went gruff when he did, like the calming rumble of an engine. “You were the leader of our best fighter company. What happened?”

  People kept asking that like they thought I’d answer. You’d think they would have learned better by now. “I’ve faced interrogators who ask fewer questions.” A green blinking light on my control panel drew my attention.

  I tried to glance at the symbols on the screen while keeping one eye on the dangers ahead. It was a distress signal. Somebody had broken down in the rings.

  Shit.

  They didn’t have the sense to enter the safe path when their ship showed signs of trouble. They were right in the middle of a gang of asteroids.

  I sighed. We couldn’t afford to lose any more pilots in The Uprising. I couldn’t stand to watch another ship go down and another life snuff out.

  I swung the Firebrand around and hoped an asteroid wasn’t waiting unseen behind my ship.

  “What are you doing?” Polaris’s voice went as shrill as static on a comm. Which was what I’d rather listen to.

  “Saving the ass of some careless wannabe pilot.”

  “A barge will pick him up once the grav manipulators clear some space—”

  “Yeah, but I can do it better and faster.” Probably. But mainly, I turned back because it was dangerous to be stranded in the rings. Not every pilot could handle navigating them. But I knew how, so I would save them now.

  “Do you have a death wish?” Polaris shouted.

  “Quite the opposite, actually.” Stunts like this were all practice so I wouldn’t die while opposing the Supremacy like so many others. I’d be so good that I wouldn’t have to rely on someone else. Someone like this idiot in the small one-person fighter who got himself stranded.

  I pulled the Firebrand alongside the other ship and started the docking mechanism. We didn’t have long before the asteroids would change course and crush us.

  The Firebrand clanged and hissed as it locked up with the fighter. I hated that sound; it meant someone else was about to come into my home, the only one I’ve ever had. Nobody else should be here.

  I shoved the feeling away. Whoever was piloting that fighter needed my help. Plus, they would have the rare opportunity to fly in a fine, agile ship like the Firebrand. They should be glad to see her.

  They would also have the common opportunity of seeing me as a mess. Flying long smuggling runs didn’t give me a reason to dress up. Besides, nobody gave me a second look when I did put in the effort. I was better at surviving and fighting than impressing. So, they would get an eyeful of a gray flight suit stained with engine grease, and my drab dark hair tied back in a rough bun at the back of my neck.

  I unbuckled the safety webbing and stepped out of the cockpit. The metal ladder down to the lower deck was right outside the door. At the bottom, lay a short corridor that led to the cargo bay. The airlock sat halfway down the hall.

  I stopped before it and kept one hand on the gun at my hip. Anyone passing through the rings should be friendly, but you never knew. There were spies everywhere, as well as decent folk with space madness.

  The door hissed open.

  “Ah man, thanks for stopping—” His voice cut of
f when he saw me. His full, soft mouth dropped open and his jade eyes widened.

  My stomach lurched like I had just dived the Firebrand straight down. My body hummed with sudden anticipation as though it remembered Orion’s caresses. I forgot how to breathe and took a step back before my hands could reach for him on their own.

  His eyes were as green as the untouched forests of Ailt-4. His curly brown hair was tangled like the wires inside a ship’s console: jumbled and complicated, and yet every strand was in its proper place. I used to trace each twisting lock of hair to its source while he smiled languid and sleepy. His navy flight suit showed off every bulge of muscle in his arms and thighs.

  He hadn’t changed in three years, and neither had my reaction to him. My heart raced, my knees wobbled.

  “You,” Orion said. His voice was soft and wondering as though nothing had changed, as though he hadn’t walked out on me.

  It broke the spell. Rage flared in my chest, burning away any lingering desire. “You,” I growled.

  Two

  “Calpurnia,” Orion said, as though in awe. “Cali…”

  I nearly told him off but caught myself. It was better if he thought I didn’t care. So, I glanced to the airlock and laughed. “You stranded your damn ship.”

  Orion grimaced. The way his soft mouth twisted to the side was still cute. He dragged a hand through his thick curly hair while tilting his head slightly back. He used to stand just like that to rinse out shampoo. But I knew he did it to show off and to enjoy that I was eyeing him.

  After what he did, he had the nerve to think I’d still enjoy the view.

  Damn him, he was right. I imagined a line of hot water running down the side of his neck, down his collarbone and chest. My fingers twitched to do the same. I was uncomfortably aware of a throbbing between my thighs.

  “I did not strand my ship. They didn’t give me enough fuel at The Station,” Orion said.

  That jolted me out of my daze. I sighed. He was always blaming someone else. Then, just to piss him off, I laughed again. “The second-best pilot in The Uprising—”

  “First best,” he said.

  I ignored the jab. “—can’t even fly into a friendly base.”

  “I can fly anywhere. In fact, I’ll show you.” Orion thrust a finger towards the cockpit and took a bold step towards the ladder. I slammed a hand again the bulkhead to block his way. The sound echoed through the empty hallway. He jerked to a stop.

  Instead of doing something decent, he trailed his gaze over me like he was peeling off my clothes and savoring every moment. I remembered the feel of his tongue along my bare skin. My heart leaped despite my best judgment, and I tensed my entire body to stop myself from moving closer to him.

  This needed to end before he started to think I was still attracted to him after what he did. I narrowed my eyes. “You’re lucky that I don’t leave your sorry ass on that ship you screwed up.”

  I expected him to argue back like he usually did. Instead, his eyes went soft with a need so sincere that it was startling. He raised a hand, tentatively reaching for my wrist as though I were a strange animal. I yanked my arm away before he could touch me.

  I wouldn’t let him get under my skin. Not again. I whirled and climbed back up the ladder. Don’t think about him. Don’t even look back at him.

  I slipped into the pilot’s seat and hooked the safety webbing over my shoulders and chest. Then Orion was there in my co-pilot seat, leaning back to rest his boots on the console. He locked his hands behind his head, which made his biceps flex, and twisted his thick fingers in his curly hair. Like he used to do.

  “Hell, this is what you fly now, Cali—”

  “Don’t call me that. And get your filthy feet off my console,” I said between clenched teeth.

  “If you give me the controls, I’ll have to move.” He flashed me a cocky smirk that should have been off-putting, but something about self-assured flyboys always made me wet. I was not going to let him know that, though.

  “You’re not touching the controls. Or anything on this ship.” I grabbed his ankle and wrenched his foot from the console. He lowered the other one and slouched in the chair. I rolled my eyes at him and turned back to the controls. “Put on your seat belt. It’s going to be a wild ride.”

  “I should hope so.” Orion winked.

  Part of me wanted to smile back. He was exactly as he was three years ago. For a moment I felt like nothing had changed, as though we were back in the happy times before the Battle of Sule. But we could never go back, not after Orion left me when I needed him the most. “You’re cleaning that console,” I told him, just to be petty.

  “It’s not dirty.” He brushed half-heartedly at the dashboard with the back of a hand. His fingers were thick and strong from working triggers all day.

  “Everything you do is dirty,” I said despite myself. He grinned. I inwardly cringed at my carelessness.

  Hell, he was on my ship for two minutes and we were already arguing and flirting as though nothing had changed. Orion was hard to resist, but I knew better than to fall for his charms. So why was I flirting with him?

  I clenched my teeth and hit the controls to disengage from his ship. If only I could disengage from him just as easily.

  Maybe I could use his presence for good—well, not good exactly, but vengeance. I could make him want me and then leave him, as he had left me. No, that was a stupid idea. If he had cared about me, he wouldn’t have left in the first place.

  “Why’d you come for me, Cali?” Orion said with that soft, delicious tone he used when murmuring sweet nothings against my neck.

  “One more word and you’ll be floating home.” To my surprise, he listened and remained silent. I studied the maze of asteroids ahead, picked out my course, and guided the Firebrand back into the turmoil. As I navigated through the rings, I stole glances at Orion to try and catch him doing something else annoying. But for once, he didn’t do or say anything.

  We swooped free of the rings and there it was. Star Keeper Base: The heart of The Uprising, the one organization that was holding back the Supremacy’s galactic conquest. The base sat in the center of the rings like a little sun with its own planetary system. Carved out of an asteroid big enough to rival many moons, it was a lumpy collection of rock and durasteel. The latter sprouted from its sides like a fungal infection. Shadows shifted and danced along its surface as the rings passed in front of its orange star.

  I aimed the Firebrand for a docking bay entrance and switched on the autopilot. Polaris would be proud, I thought with a chuckle. Orion raised an eyebrow at me, but I ignored him.

  The Firebrand glided into the docking bay and settled into her spot between two battered fighters. I quickly ran through the systems checks, lowered the exit ramp, and powered down. The sooner I was done, the sooner I’d be away from Orion.

  “That was nice flying, Calpurnia,” he said.

  Like I cared what he thought. I grunted in response.

  “Why’d you leave?” he said softly.

  “You left—nope, you know what? We’re not getting into this.”

  “Not that. I meant, why did you leave the air force?”

  Because I couldn’t stand any more loss.

  “We miss you,” he said.

  His words were like the flamethrowers we used to carve Obok Base out of a glacier. They melted something hard and cold inside me that I hadn’t even realized was there. He was lying, I told myself. If people had missed me, they wouldn’t have kept strolling out of my life as easily as leaving a room. He wouldn’t have left me.

  “I got tired of you flyboys,” I said, climbing from my seat and leaving the cockpit without even glancing at him.

  He laughed. Unlike the rest of him, it was a warm, gentle sound like steam rising from sauna stones. “Nobody gets tired of us flyboys.”

  “Must be nice to be so delusional,” I said as I darted down the ladder to the lower deck.

  “It really is,” he called behind me, his
voice echoing through my ship.

  Only a few more minutes, I reminded myself, and he’d be off my ship and out of my life again like he always was.

  Three

  As I hurried down the ramp to get away from Orion, Polaris strolled up to the Firebrand with a squad of labor bots. Behind his goggles, his eyes were the navy-blue of dusk on Erow, my home world. Their color was a good match for his dark skin and midnight black hair that he wore cropped close to his skin. His loose-fitting pullover couldn’t hide the hint of lean muscle along his arms.

  That was new. Though his voice always greeted me when I returned from missions, I rarely saw him in person. He stayed in the control room, and I left quickly on new missions. It must have been six or seven months since we last met face to face. He had filled out nicely since then.

  “I warned you not to go back for the stranded ship,” Polaris said.

  “Were you listening in?” I snapped.

  He looked at me with his twilight eyes wide as jumpgates. “I would never do that to you, Cal…Calpurnia…Captain.”

  I snorted softly, almost flattered by his nervousness.

  “Oh, right, ah, you have to report for medical right away,” he said. That was standard procedure to ensure I was fit enough to handle the next job.

  “They have a mission waiting for you.” He added and quirked his mouth like the flicker of a malfunctioning screen.

  “There’s something you aren’t telling me.” I took a step towards him.

  For once, he didn’t shuffle back. He smiled instead. He never smiled with teeth, but the boyish dimples made up for that. That might be why I liked to tease him. He was so cute.

  “I know nothing,” he said.

  “Don’t become a spy or smuggler, Po, you can’t lie worth a shit.”

  Orion strolled down the ramp, and I shot him a warning glare. “After the medical, I’ll be returning to my ship. You better be out of here by then.” He arched an eyebrow and I turned my back to him, locking my arm with Polaris just to piss off Orion.